Welcome!
LYCAN SUBSCRIBE Presents
DONN'S WYKKYD AMBITIONS
For all your deliciously wicked needs!
For useful House Hold Appliances and dispute resolution, see our line of amazing products,
GNOME AWAY.
Now, New and improved!
Are pesky house gnomes a problem?
Do they drink all your beer, eat all your snacks and fart when you have guests?
Have other pest control systems failed?
Were your neighbors not amused about the gunshots, flames and explosions?
Then The Original
GNOME AWAY
is the answer to your needs!
Now in a new electrified version, 175,000,000 volts 150,000Watts of Thunder and lightning!
Batteries not included.
Formerly known as Sprite Splat!
It Smashes it bashes it makes em flat!
Just one smack and they go splat!
Those pesky Gnomes won't come back!
Satisfaction Guaranteed!
Also useful for
Annoying neighbors
Jehovah's witnesses
Mormons
Antifa Protesters
As well as all errant fae
It drives the point Home!
Guaranteed to leave an impression!
Comes with a lifetime warranty.
Get yours today!
This product endorsed by
Mal says, “ Big Boom! Big Splat, big boomy Boom boom splat and smash!
Remember
Speak softly and carry Gnome Away!
You will be shocked at the attention you receive. People will notice and listen very closely to everything you say! No more being lost in the crowd, ignored, talked over.
It even puts narcissists in their place!
Instant Respect Guaranteed!
Another Fine Product Of Gnome Away!
FREAKING
INTENSELY
NASTY and
ENTHUSIASTIC !
GNOME AWAY , only F.I.N.E. product solutions.
We also provide special
Counseling Services:
Life and Relationship advice,
Trust The Original
NOOKIE WOOKIE.
LYCAN SUBSCRIBE!
Introducing
Our Newest Business Endeavor,
WYKKYD AMBITIONS
PIZZA -MORGUE
You Stab em, We Slab em!
Yesterday's Loss is Today's Sauce!
Group discounts, eat in, take out
Free pickup and delivery!
Our Sauce is Finger Licking Good and Toe sucking Evil.
All Meats Always Fresh!
Other services are available:
Conflict resolution.
Bio hazard containment ,
Debt collections
General special messenger services.
Satisfaction Guaranteed.
Our team of professional Lycanthropic Hellbillies are on call 24-7, Ready to serve your needs!
Cash only. Gold, Bonds, or Souls.
Silver is Not Accepted.
No refunds or exchanges.
All Protesters, Complainers, annoying patrons, unattended children,
Will be beaten tender, sauced served and eaten.
You can find us easily, we are just off the last exit of the Highway To Hell, Route 666.
Right between The No Tell Hotel
And the Motel Hell
You can't miss us,
Look for the Giant Kilted Werewolf.
Call Today!
Tell them Lon Chaney sent you!
1-666-666-5150 Ext OU812
The Care and Feeding of Lycanthropic Hellbillies is time consuming and expensive.
As are emotional support axes.
THANK YOU!